“…no one sober knows if they’re going to be sober forever. It was a forgiving moment, and it humbled me.”
This is something I am always repeating to peers and fellow patients of addiction treatment. They get it, too. It makes me chuckle sometimes, however, because people with no personal ties to addiction always look confused. They might hear me say that I cannot guarantee my own sobriety and promise myself that I’ll be sober in a year or a day, as I am mentally locked in to RIGHT NOW. Today. Living in the present is most certainly a skill from which our fast-paced, anticipatory society would benefit greatly. Unfortunately, though, it is a skill that must be learned, and it’s not easy. I still struggle with living in the moment as I have always been a diehard worrier.
Even though it might sound discouraging to hear me say that I cannot promise myself (nor anyone else, for that matter), that I’ll still be sober in a week, it really, truly is not. This belief is actually a source of comfort for me. It is not that I am expecting to fall hard into a relapse in the future, it is that I working hard and trying to prevent a relapse right now.
Think about it.